


Corridors in our Hearts

by Marta_Ayanami



Series: Luxu!! I've Heard Enough.  /Chain of Hearts [11]
Category: Kingdom Hearts, don't read before playing KH3 or watching all KH3 cutscenes?
Genre: Canon Compliant, my headcanons too, same verse as 'Scribbled Notes' - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-13
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:08:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21778066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marta_Ayanami/pseuds/Marta_Ayanami
Summary: Ienzo knew how much Darkness his---Even had.
Series: Luxu!! I've Heard Enough.  /Chain of Hearts [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1576777
Kudos: 11





	Corridors in our Hearts

The thought came to him that Even might've used a Dark Corridor in order to leave Radiant Garden. That's what Vexen would've done.

_And me, or rather, myself._

Ienzo concentrated. Pretended to be Zexion. Pretended he could smell the Darkness in the air. Closed his eyes. Saw a Dark Corridor clearly in his mind--

_\--to your home---_

When ~~_Zexion_~~ Ienzo opened ~~_Zexion's_ ~~his own eyes, there was no Dark Corridor there, not outside his own mind. Ergo, V--Even used no Dark Corridor as well, couldn't have used one. Simply impossible.

(However, Lea used Darkness willy nilly? How come? ~~_fingers on my throat_~~ well, of course he did. Why wouldn't Axel? To be expected of _Saïx_ 's best friend, after all. If asked, ~~_Zexion_~~ Ienzo could even believe that Lea's Heart was darker than Axel's ever was, seeing as Axel had no heart to speak of _~~Xemnas's lie, forget? Axel had a heart for years, ditto Saix, I had none, because everybody lied to me, when I was a boy, just a boy, they said--~~_

Exactly.

 _Some day,_ Ienzo thought, _Riku will smell the horrid Darkness on Lea, and murder Lea at last, just like--- exactly like--- oh, I can't wait. Until then, I won't touch Lea, ~~seeing as of course Lea is now the best friend of all Sora's. I will play nice. After all, if my--Ansem the Wise forgave me--and I forgave him?? Or would, if he ASKED??--then I can play nice even with Lea, until his own sins~~ __catch up to him. And to ~~Saïx~~ Isa._

 _I don't know if I'm patient, but_ _maybe ~~Zexion~~ I can be patient enough. What is 'forgiveness' anyway? Do I want to forgive? Do ~~oes Zexion?~~ Do I? If to forgive means to forget... I haven't quite forgotten ~~fingers on his throat, and Aeleus's death, and, and, and-- I don't know. I don't know, and that's what's illogical~~_ infuriating, but I am happy to be with a Heart _~~to be alive, existing, and still, I--~~_ have no powers anymore.

Ienzo again called upon Darkness. Nothing appeared. What a damned good person he was, huh? And that's good, maybe, as apparently, ~~_I'm such a good person, I won't even be called to some ancient graveyard._~~

~~_(_ As if, Ze--Ienzo imagined an old notfriend say, and grimaced. But not today, he imagined same voice saying.) ~~

~~ Good. I'm tired. ~~

~~ Tired. ~~

~~Too tired.~~ I will rest here, at home. ~~Hollow---~~ Radiant Garden.

Whatever happened, it's in the past. He's too tired for the past in the present. And he likes his neck as it is, with no fingers touching it.

Whatever happened is in the past. And it's wonderful to-- breathe. And to feel ~~_not always, but--_~~ _Let go of any blames and sins, in order to breathe. Be helpful, always. Be nice. Forgiving_ ~~ _. Breathe. And wait--_~~ _And breathe. And protect L--Aeleus, that way. And breathe. And show Aeleus I'm a good boy, now, again._ ~~  
~~

**~~(As if)~~ **

_No,_ Z---Ienzo realised _, I'm not lying, if I ever had Darkness again, all I'd do with it is some nice coat for myself and armour for L--Aeleus. That's enough. Enough forever. Not fighting again._

_Meeting Ansem again -I was so--- I couldn't--- the Heart hurts too much, if Aeleus wasn't there, I couldn't breathe, I-- I don't know what I FELT._

_Feelings._

_I'm tired. How many years of guilt in one day?  
_

_At least, I can breathe?_

A consolation prize. Enough for now. For a boy, who--

( ** ~~And where's the man?~~** )

Nowhere, surely, the boy can hope, Ienzo can, as long as he has the boy's protector's. The scientist can be a boy. Nobody ever minded.

It's fine. Only barely standing, inside. Wobbly all of a sudden. Only inside, thankfully.

Tired.

And barely knowing truth from illusion anymore, and so, being a good and helpful redeemed citizen of R---H---Radiant Garden is fine... feels better, for now. Doesn't it?

When he woke up, he cried. True tears of -remorse? Exhaustion? Relief? All? Neither? He doesn't want to cry true tears a second time. They hurt like _~~wisps of existence draining off me, by fake one's hand and assassin's word, and S--~~ enough, you can blame people through fake until Xehanort or until Terra or until Erqus and nothing will change ~~but maybe my mood~~_ And so, he'll be what everyone wants him to be, won't he? _Picture perfect, if I want. Just let me be. Just let me exist, even if I made mistakes - I can even say that my mistakes are greater than anybody else's, if that let's me exist ~~\--a lie, but perfectly fine.~~ and that I was naive ~~was I?how pathetic, I'd rather not~~ And to never cry again._

_Everything else... another time._

_Yesterday, I tried to create an illusion, even a tiniest one, but there's nothing. I have no Magic left._

Unless everything was an illusion. But such thoughts were better left alone _~~like me.~~_

_Not even Lexaues ~~Aeleus~~ would understand. And I know what I'm thinking. ~~Do I?~~  
_

_Not even him._

~~ **( _That's right.)_ ** ~~

It was, and Ienzo knew it. He wasn't a genius young prodigy for nothing. Despite currently having temporary trouble with illusions or lack thereof, which made understanding inner reality very hard.

Still, he knew enough. He must, as the most intelligent person in the castle right now. If not, what even ~~_am I?_~~


End file.
